_{I like this. I'm not too sure of the "Why don't you" line though, things like that tend to make my eyes go a bit haywire and I lose the flow of the poem. Other than that, great as usual.}

--
^{{ and the rivers of blood pushed back in my veins. }}

Not bad, although the "credit card flat" line confuses me, because all the digits on a credit card are raised and bumpy, or maybe that was the point. This raises a big difference between guys and girls though, when there's a problem between two people (for me at least) then the guy wants to fix it as soon as possible, whereas girls tend to shy away from it and fix it in their own minds first. Quite the conundrum.

I fully agree with Lee on this one.

it is perfect.

I really love the first stanza:
'credit-card flat words' - now there's a brilliant image! Makes me think of the cold and impersonal nature of credit cards, and things like materialism and superficiality. Brilliant.

'suction-cupped hands over metal-heavy eyes' - more thoughts on artificialness and blank blindness. You always have unique imagery

The last thing I will say about the first stanza is that I love the line break before 'I will regret' - it kind of lets 'I will regret' stand on its own, showing how, no matter what we do, we'll always have regrets.

'maybe then we can have a talk
about how this really feels.'
I don't know about these lines - ordinarily I'd say they were a bit 'telly', saying more than showing. But somehow they work.

Anyway, I really like this piece - well done you, once again

--
[Philippians 1:21]

very impressive. it almost made me cry

--
If HIV is devine punishment, then lesbians must be gods chosen people!
[link] -go to this link!

This poem confuses me.

Glad to have you back on my friends list. dA incenerated it and I had to piece it back together. I like this especially the first stanza.

--
My Gallery | The aim of art is to represent not the outward appearance of things, but their inward significance.
Aristotle

"You paint a decimal point between your lungs as you count the wheezes
in your oxygen, then put your foot beneath my heartbeat."

that line is incredible. I love the way you worded it; it's so true, so real, but I never ever would have been able to think of that image. just proves how talented you are :]

something about the first couple lines, though, threw me off. I don't think it was the credit card description, but the other two -- the eyelids and the cupped hands -- were just a little too much. I'd suggest toning down the eyelid description and just say cupped hands. That way, it's easy to get into the flow of the poem.